Monday, November 26, 2012

Live Freeze or Fried

Drove behind a guy yesterday for awhile on the way into the market's parking lot who had a McCain sticker on his back bumper. Because if there's only one thing I'm worse at than being a good loser is being a good winner, I made it a point to pull in to the lot beside him and get out of my car as he did his.

Glancing at his sticker I offered, 'you must really like their french fries.' He looked at me with narrowing eyes and seemed to be scanning the sector to see if an attendant was hurrying towards us. There wasn't-I had already looked. "Of course," I added, "you can't beat Ore-Ida for tater tots."

He made a slight face and muttered something about 'everybody's a comedian' but my larger point, unmade because I went for the cheap laugh instead of the teachable moment is that the Senator from Arizona contested the 2008 Presidential election. McCain's candidacy was old news this time four years ago. Now it is just bad-mannered obstinacy.

Everyone is always running for something, I guess. With me in the room most of the rest of the occupants are heading for exits but in less than three weeks since this year's national contest, Senator Marco Rubio of Florida has started making noise like he'd like the next GOP dance. I have no idea how good a person or Senator he is though I'm sure he does fine in at least one of those areas.

The Senator would obviously be not so good at one of those carny booths where they guess your weight and age, at least the latter. I say that based on this attempt by a member of the Senate Commerce, Science and Transportation Committee to answer Michael Hainey of GQ Magazine's 'how old do you think the earth is' question. And he seemed like such a nice young man, didn't he? I didn't say smart; I said nice.


The state of Florida was a national joke in 2000 because of hanging chads and a widespread belief in your citizens' perceived inabilities to make up their minds. I'm not sure what to make of your junior Senator's attempt to currying the favor of whackjobs and wingnuts in the belief they might be registered voters by pretending scientific fact is science fiction on something as elementary as the age of the planet we both share.

If this opportunist is the best that the party of Lincoln has to offer (and in fairness, it's a little early for the crop of 2016 to start showing up), you guys and gals, but mostly guys (white guys) better keep your day jobs since you're going nowhere in a hurry. I'm unhappily surprised with you, I really am, and your latest pretty, preening poster boy is just your most recent disappointment.

You rejected any effort to work together at the national level since capturing the House of Representatives in 2010, believing instead your intransigence would help you take back the White House in 2012 and had/have no plan B when that didn't happen. It might well be the end of this decade before some of those in your party concede Romney didn't win and possibly another decade before those bumper stickers get shredded. At the point at which the Mitt hits the fan, I'll be asking if you'd like fries with that. I'm positive you will.
-bill kenny

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