Tuesday, April 19, 2016

A Big Cat Will Scratch You

Some days this stuff writes itself; sadly when that happens, it rarely rights itself. 
Submitted for your examination

Animal cruelty, actual or threatened, is certainly nothing to be encouraged or condoned, but this is one of these stories where I read it and go, ‘yeah, this is about right for a state whose hanging chads decided a Presidential election sixteen years ago.’ 

And there’s a Joe Friday quality about Officer Frederick Munn of (I'm assuming) the Gainesville police in speaking with Madeline Joan Kaye about her text messages demanding a ransom (or else) for a kitten she told the officer she doesn’t have, noting, “(d)efendant stated that the messages are representatives or examples of HUMOR.”

Law enforcement officials who put the word humor in ALL CAPS are perilously close to out of patience with whoever is using humor as a defense, especially since they have clearly demonstrated having no idea of what humor actually is. I admire his restraint. I think in that same spirit of HUMOR he should have read Ms. Kaye her Carmen Miranda rights.

Talk about big yuks! That would have been Yuuuuge! (Rhymes with Nuge!) 

Sort of like that slumbering feline on Trump’s noggin.
-bill kenny

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