No matter. I'll be brief.
The graphic below will make more sense, especially in light of the title of today's epistle when you read/watch this. Or maybe not. (I learned that trick during the election cycle: pretend to make promises. They're easier to break that way.)
I was hoping there'd be at least one funny haircut between the two so I could smile at the constancy of the universe but that might be pushing a little too hard.
Anyway, enjoy spending money you don't have to buy things you don't want to impress people you don't like. And don't forget to hold onto your receipt. You'll need it to show something for today when it ends.