Sunday, October 21, 2012

To Want What We Have

My wife and I married thirty-five years ago this morning at twenty after ten. I look at the photographs Sigrid's dad, Franz, took on that day (Franz passed a number of years ago) and smile because my wife and I look like children. Living with me for three and half decades cannot NOT leave a mark but Sigrid is as beautiful as the first time I saw her and always will be.

I am not an easy person to know, much less to marry. I am loud, obstinate, quick to anger and slow to forgive. I neither forgive nor forget any injury or slight (real or imagined) which makes getting on with our lives more problematic than it needs to be.

I have referred to by my (very) few acquaintances (I have no friends because I don't know how to be one) as an acquired taste who is 'somewhat concentrated' (that is, a little of me goes a long way). Most people who can tolerate me do only so because they are fond of my wife-I came with the frame. She is my human credential.

None of this is new or shocking to my bride. I suspect she likes challenges, which helps explain the original appeal and she may have felt she hit the jackpot when we married. If that's so, one of my lasting regrets is that she hasn't felt that way every day of our shared lives.

I hope you are fortunate enough to love someone as much as I love her. That, in return, she loves me completely for absolutely no reason and sometimes despite who I am,, makes our relationship that much more amazing. She is the most important person in every aspect of my life.

I can get up every morning and battle the trolls who populate my universe because she is the calm at the center and makes our life together the reason and the reward for always coming home. Before her, I could never imagine loving any one ever. Since her I cannot imagine loving any one else. I know it seems to her like a lot longer than thirty-five years. I blame it on the metric system; I wish she would, too.

And it's little romantic flourishes like this one ^ ^ that lets her know she fuels the passion of my gypsy soul.  

Happy anniversary, angel eyes.
-bill kenny

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