Wednesday, October 31, 2018

Ballots Over Everything Else

If you’re tired of reading articles and letters about our election choices and the consequences of those choices, you might want to skip past what follows today. Not that I’m taking sides because I’m not; at least not in a public forum. That’s why we have secret ballots. Anyway, here goes.

This time next week thanks to an election process too many of us take for granted far more than we ever should, the dawning day will mark the morning after of yet another election. Whether the results are good or bad will depend on your perspective as the beholder as well the prism through which you view the results.

Like you, I suspect, I have some strong personal opinions about the choices for voices we have this election cycle but I think I’ve kept them mostly to myself. I'm grateful, despite appearances otherwise, to everyone who has offered to serve no matter the office; quite frankly more grateful for some, perhaps than for others, but it takes all kinds to make a world.

After we have assured one another that we have registered to vote, have the documentation we need to bring to the polling place and know where we need to go to cast our ballots, we should make sure we are informed on the issues and the candidates' positions and then vote based on our best judgment. More than that can no one ask, but less than that should no one expect.

Opinions according to the old saw, are like noses; everybody has one and they all smell.
Regardless of any of the decisions we make Tuesday in matters of leadership at the Governor’s mansion through the seats in the legislature, it's highly unlikely either the dawning of the Age of Aquarius or the end of the world will follow as an outcome; though it may feel like it, for some.

Our decisions and actions, and the consequences of both will make or break us. How well we, as supporters and proponents of candidates have explained them to one another, the people with the power at the voting booth, will be a critical factor.

The lesson we should learn from last week's murder of two people of color in Kentucky, the  bombing threats, and the slaughter of Jewish worshippers in Pittsburgh is that open, honest communications can build bridges between the different segments of our communities just as deceitful, duplicitous efforts create distrust both of those elected to govern and of one another.   

Our informed votes are critical to the success of who we are as a state. Just as there are no insignificant votes there are unimportant offices in elected government. That's why you can't have enough information before you cast your vote-but please don't allow yourself to be overwhelmed by your responsibility. Don’t choose to NOT choose.

When the polls close Tuesday evening, whether you see yourself as a victor or a victim is entirely up to you. The decision to be better or bitter is yours alone. 
Your vote is our voice. so be as loud as you can.
-bill kenny

Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Monday, October 29, 2018

Sometimes There's Only Madness

More and more across my country, the United States of America, there are headlines that I believed in my lifetime I would see only in someone else's country but that is no longer true in any sense of the word. 

Not all devils are in hell
More and more often there seem to be no words for what we are doing to each other. 



In this case, those were the only words I could find that make sense. 


אני מצטער על האובדן שלך.
-bill kenny

Sunday, October 28, 2018

Somedays, It's Easier Said than Done

Some days are diamonds while other days are dust but they are all the same length and we each only get one of them at a time.

True, no matter what time the alarm goes off.
Choose wisely and well and let the day begin
-bill kenny 

Saturday, October 27, 2018

Some Post "Bomb Stuff" Thoughts

At some point in the course of my lifetime, the USA has become an outtake from Lord of the Flies, with the accompanying chaos. We have more metal detectors in our schools than at our airports. We spend more to incarcerate people than we do to educate them in the elementary school system. And we yell at one another whether we know each other or not at almost every waking moment.

Instead of complementing the universe opened through applied technology for education, we leave our children alone with a machine, the personal computer, more fraught with peril than the TV our parents were blamed for plopping us in front of. And then we 'wonder and worry about the kids.'

There's enough hate right now in this country for everyone to have a heaping helping with plenty to spare and far more ways of spreading it faster than any of us could have ever imagined. Yes indeed, Mr. and Mrs. Orwell, this is the Brave New World, so put on a brave new world face.
-bill kenny

Friday, October 26, 2018

Et Tu, Tony?

I have on (a very) rare occasion had a cup of pumpkin spice coffee. Please note I did not write 'enjoyed a cup of pumpkin spice coffee.' I have no memory of ever asking for a refill but stranger things have happened I'm sure. 

Especially here in historic New England, the semi-official home of the origins of all things Halloweeny, between the Salem Witch Trials and Ichabod Crane, so I've become inured to the idea that from shortly after Labor Day until right around Black Friday if a product or service can incorporate pumpkin spice into its essence well, by golly by gum, it will have pumpkin spice! Damit, basta, ende

It helps explain this: 


And this: 


But this?


As Nancy (but not Sluggo) once asked so eloquently, why
-bill kenny

Thursday, October 25, 2018

(What Are) Words Worth?

“My country, right or wrong; if right, to be kept right; and if wrong, to be set right.” — Senator Carl Schurz, February 29, 1872.


Pro Tip, Mango Mussolini: “‘My country, right or wrong,’ is a thing that no patriot would think of saying. It is like saying, ‘My mother, drunk or sober.’” — G. K. Chesterton.
-bill kenny

Wednesday, October 24, 2018

We Are the United Nations

There's an expression, 'it's hard to see the forest for the trees,' which to me suggests it can be a struggle to maintain a view of the Big Picture while also concentrating on details. We live in a world where doing both simultaneously can be critical to success, as an individual, a family, or as a nation. 

Today is United Nations Day marking the anniversary in 1945 of the ratification of UN Charter by the majority of its signatories. With its ratification, the United Nations officially came into being. It's also my brother's birthday but we've both agreed to not suggest cause and effect, so I won't. You probably didn't see any cards to celebrate the UN's Birthday (or my brother's for that matter) when you went shopping over the weekend so you could be wondering what’s my point.

My point is that seventy-three years ago, a weary world exhausted from a global conflict that had consumed most of the previous decade gambled that working harder to understand one another might be preferable to taking up arms against each other on the regular and recurring basis we had been for centuries past. For the most part, so far, so good.    

But across our country from the steps of the Supreme Court to the busiest streets and loneliest highways, we are, as a nation, right now less kind to one another (to say nothing about how we treat those beyond our borders), less tolerant of those whose opinions differ from our own and less understanding of those who don’t look like us, speak our language or pray differently than we do than we have been for many, many years. 

The scariest part is so many of us are proud of this. Perhaps we’ve lost sight of the many different trees that are the forest we consider to be our country and we've forgotten that "E pluribus unum," or "out of many, one," our motto from the time thirteen British colonies declared independence has not been replaced with “Hoc est meum; non tangere,” or “This is mine; don’t touch it.”

We are a notion that became a nation and an example the world now strives to emulate and imitate. We have a statue in a New York harbor known the world over that we could easily duplicate and situate all across this land because we are, each of us, the example of acceptance, collaboration, innovation, and tolerance that sets us apart from every other nation.    

Here in Norwich, we’re good, and always working to get better, about celebrating all of the different people, customs, and nations who make us the Rose City as well as a Global City.

We just had a weekend with both an Oktoberfest at Ponemah Mills and a Polish Fest in Franklin Square and our municipal calendar is dotted year-round with ceremonies, commemorations, and celebrations that should us help remember and realize that people of every stripe united by shared values and purpose are needed to build a great and united nation. And that forming an even more perfect union is both very hard and rewarding work but we're worth it.
-bill kenny

Tuesday, October 23, 2018

Try to Never Confuse Luck with Skill

I came across that suggestion the other day, and, single-minded cretin that I am often (with reason) accused of being, thought of the ten of thousands if not hundreds of thousands of small and quiet decisions that households across this nation make on a daily and weekly basis as the economic tides rise and fall and threaten by so doing to pull so many of us under. 

A non-economist acquaintance once shared with me 'when you're out of a job, it's a recession; when I'm out of a job, it's a depression' and I suspect there's more to that than meets the eye. Every day the Dow Jones Industrial Average does something and some people smile and others grimace and various politicians shout and point about it (usually called leadership by their followers) and I have close to no idea what to make of the fluctuations and undulations. 

I don't think I'm alone. We all assume or did until it turned out the whole house of cards decided to reshuffle itself, that someone somewhere knew and understood what it was we were doing for most of the last decade and a half. Like Wimpy, offering to gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today knowing full well we would have no money on Tuesday, we just kept adding days to the calendar and hoped Tuesday wouldn't arrive (not counting today of course). 

When the economic ship of state started taking on water, I didn't really understand the big picture and, like so many, haven't been as successful as I'd like in appreciating the larger picture and fuller impact. Why isn't it all this just Accidental Excellence (like this variant)?


Y'know, when we got it right, we had no idea what we did to produce those positive results so, not surprisingly we couldn't duplicate them, so when things started to go south, we went with them. It's hard to not be superstitious, wash your face and hands until you get the bill at the end of the month for soap and water. 

In times of stress we rely more on routines, they offer us the appearance of the familiar, the known and the comfortable and serve, in their way, as a mantra against a world we cannot otherwise manage.
-bill kenny

Monday, October 22, 2018

Don't Forget to Add Ves

This story adds a whole new meaning to the phrase Holy Cow

And you thought I was going to invoke George Harrison to mock John Curno. You're right.
-bill kenny

Sunday, October 21, 2018

A Sentiment that Bears Repeating Endlessly

Today, on this date in 1977 at 1020 in the morning in the Offenbach am Main Rathaus in (West) Germany. Sigrid Schubert and I were married. Forty-one years ago. Sigrid says it often feels a lot longer than that but that's because, I hope, the Germans use the metric system. I mean, what else could it be?    



How lucky can one guy get, eh? I've never known what she saw or sees in me (aside from a great personality, rapier-like wit complementing a puckish sense of humor, a body like Adonis (Joey Adonis from West Orange near Prospect Plains)), all hobbled by a nearly crippling sense of modesty that is my lifelong cross to bear; oh, and delusions, almost forgot those) but she is my entire world.  

She is everything I have wanted to be or to do and she makes me a better man by knowing that she loves me, often despite who I am. I can remember the most minute of details of that day and have driven her and both of our adult children almost to distraction by recounting them incessantly AND on an annual basis, so I'll skip them here, but they know what will happen, just not when.

I hope with all my heart wherever in this world you find yourself that you also have and keep someone who will hold your heart forever as she has mine. I don't remember often enough to tell her I love her though I will today and vow to be better every day we have together for all the days that remain. Happy Anniversary, angel eyes. 
-bill kenny

Saturday, October 20, 2018

You Deserve a B(r)eak Today

Another Moldy Oldie: 

There are days when the public relations kids cannot make this stuff up. That's why they have radio, print and television outlets. Who among us, toiling in the pursuit of persuasion, doesn't want rabid fans of your good or service who will ACCEPT NO LESS than your product, OR ELSE? This is one such 'news from the newsroom floor' item and if I'm in the fast-food business I'm riding this palomino pony until the little guy's legs wear down to the nubs and my stirrups touch the ground: "Woman gets violent over lack of McNuggets".

Not sure if I was more surprised that she pleaded not guilty (I realize the presumption and assumption of innocence is the cornerstone of our legal system) or that she was, as I understand it, arraigned on a Saturday.

Toledo, Ohio, may be suffering a shortage of Chicken McNuggets and that's unfortunate (unless you're a chicken) and, I'll admit, may not speak well for their casual dining industry, but....that their court system is in session on a Saturday morning, is refreshing. The system not only works, it works on weekends, and, I suspect, is as diligent in running to ground felonious foodies, be they pizza pilferers, doughnut delinquents or even kebabnappers.


This entire incident underscores my belief in law and order, though in this case, I think the attempted order actually preceded (and in no small part) precipitated the encounter with the law. I wouldn't be surprised if Dick Wolf sees some money in all of this. And as I'm working through the various accounts, I've developed a respect for the physical prowess of Melodi Dushane, who has the look of a woman very accustomed to getting her Chicken McNuggets with as many different dipping sauces as she wants. 

I'm wondering if Wendy's, which began in Ohio, have contacted her for an endorsement. I think they're just rolling out a new spicy chicken nugget, and you know how they say 'timing is everything'. If they also offer, as a beverage choice, Hawaiian Punch, we could see some awesome cross-promotional commercials during this World Series. But for your own safety sit back from the screen.
-bill kenny

Friday, October 19, 2018

Why America Needs to Switch to the Metric System

I've often laughed when I've opened up my spam folder in my email; I'm sure you have, too. Some of my favorites are the notes that have "Final Reminder" in the subject line but that you've seen a dozen or more times earlier. Seriously? 

I also chuckle when I get an e-mail (or two or thirty) from the Director of the FBI and, on a regular basis so perhaps her husband, the Mango Mussolini, should be concerned, from Melania Trump. Of course, all of it is bogosity incarnate but it is a fun read.

And then earlier in the week this showed up and cracked me up. Aside from "Best Use of ALL CAPS in a Dramatic Role," (will be a category in next year's Oscars, I'm told) is just the attitude that comes through in every line. Read for yourself: 

HELLO MY ASSOCIATES.

MY NAME IS Mohammed Bill, AM A DRUG LORD. WHAT I DO FOR A LIVING IS COCAINE BUSINESS, THAT IS KIND OF BUSINESS I DO, AND I HAVE SO MANY HECTARE'S OF LAND WHERE MY WORKER'S WORK FOR ME AND PRODUCE COCAINE FOR ME. 

COCAINE BUSINESS IS THE BUSINESS I DO FOR A LIVING THAT MADE ME WHO I AM TODAY AS A MULTI-BILLIONAIRE, BUT I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT IN THIS BUSINESS AM TALKING ABOUT, THAT THERE IS SO MUCH CASH IN IT AND IT IS ONE BUSINESS THAT I REALLY KNOW THAT YIELDS BULK MONEY IN RETURN. 

LET ME TELL YOU THIS, AM NOT INTO THIS BUSINESS BEFORE, BUT IT IS SOMEONE I MET 27 YEARS AGO IN MY EMAIL THAT INTRODUCED ME INTO THIS COCAINE BUSINESS SO MANY YEARS AGO AND TOLD ME TO INVEST MY MONEY IN THIS BUSINESS THAT I WILL NOT REGRET IT IN RETURN AND I FOLLOWED HIS ADVISE AND INVESTED MY MONEY IN THE BUSINESS AND TODAY THIS BUSINESS HAVE REALLY SHOWED ME THE WAY TO RICHES AND WHY AM TELLING YOU THIS IS BECAUSE IT IS WHAT I DO TO GET TO WHERE I AM TODAY IN MY LIFE AS A MULTI- BILLIONAIRE.

I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT IN THIS BUSINESS FOR YOU TO MAKE IT, YOU HAVE TO INVEST WITH HUGE AMOUNT OF MONEY FOR YOU TO MAKE IT SO FAST THE WAY YOU WANT AND YOU MUST HAVE THE HEART OF A LION TO DO THIS BUSINESS AND YOU MUST ALSO HAVE MONEY TO DO THIS BUSINESS. 

AM NOT TALKING OF ANY HOW MONEY HERE, THE TYPE OF MONEY AM TALKING ABOUT HERE IS MILLIONS OF DOLLARS BECAUSE ANYBODY THAT WILL DO THIS BUSINESS MUST BE A MULTI -MILLIONAIRE FOR YOU TO DO THE BUSINESS.

THIS BUSINESS IS NOT FOR ANYONE THAT IS POOR THAT CAN'T AFFORD TO PAY MY BILLS. I DON'T NEED ANYONE THAT HE/SHE PERSONALLY KNOWS THAT HE CAN NOT AFFORD MY BILLS TO EVEN BOTHER ME WITH HIS EMAIL BECAUSE THE TYPE OF MONEY AM TALKING HERE IS MILLIONS OF DOLLARS, THE ONLY PEOPLE I WANNA SEE IN MY EMAIL IS SOMEONE THAT HE/SHE REALLY KNOW VERY WELL THAT HE/SHE CAN AFFORD MY BILLS WHICH IS (2.4 MILLION USD DOLLARS)

IF YOU KNOW THAT YOU CAN AFFORD MY BILL OF (2.4 MILLION USD DOLLARS) YOU ARE VERY WELCOME TO DO BUSINESS WITH ME AND THIS (2.4 MILLION USD DOLLARS) I CHARGE FOR MY OWN COCAINE IS THE PRICE I USE TO SELL IT TO MY FORMER BUYERS THAT BUY FROM ME FOR SO MANY YEARS AGO. 

IT HAS BEEN PLACED ON THIS PRICE FOR SO MANY YEARS NOW AND I SELL MY OWN IN TWO FULLY LOADED BRIEFCASES FOR THE PRICE OF (2.4 MILLION USD DOLLARS) THAT IS THE PRICE I HAVE BEEN SELLING IT, SO IF YOU ARE COMING TO BUY FROM ME I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT YOU MUST HAVE MY MONEY AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT THE FIRST OR THE SECOND PERSON EVEN THE LAST PERSON THAT I RENDER SERVICES TO. 

AM HERE TO DO MY BUSINESS AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I HAVE BEEN IN THIS BUSINESS FOR MANY YEARS NOW, S0 IF YOU WANT TO BUY FROM ME AND IF YOU WANT US TO DO BUSINESS YOU MUST AGREE WITH ME AND DO WHATEVER I ASK YOU TO DO.

NOTE; IF YOU WANT US TO DO THIS BUSINESS YOU MUST PROVIDE ALL THESE DETAILS THAT I NEED.
(1)YOUR-----EMAIL ADDRESS
(2)YOUR-----PHONE NUMBER
(3)YOUR PICTURE(IS IMPORTANT)
(3)YOUR-----COUNTRY(WHERE YOU RESIDE AND YOUR NATIONALITY)

IF I RECEIVE ALL THE DETAILS I ASKED FOR, THEN I WILL KNOW THAT YOU ARE READY FOR BUSINESS WITH ME.

I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT THE PACKAGE WILL ONLY BE DELIVERED TO YOU BY MY SALES PARTNERS AND THE KIND OF PEOPLE THAT WORK FOR ME AS MY SALES PARTNER ARE HIGH SUPER STARTS CLASSIC CELEBRITIES AND REV PASTORS. 

I WILL NOT MENTION THERE NAMES TO YOU BECAUSE THEY ARE THE PEOPLE THAT HAVE BEEN WORKING FOR ME FOR SO MANY YEARS NOW AND THEY ARE TRUSTWORTHY. 

I HAVE SO MANY OF THEM THAT WORKS FOR ME AND DELIVER MY GOODS TO ANY OF MY CLIENT THAT NEEDS MY SERVICES, THEY WILL BE THE ONE TO DELIVER IT TO YOU IN YOUR COUNTRY OR THE CITY YOU ARE STAYING IF YOU AGREE WITH MY TERMS.

NOTE: IF WE MUST DO THIS BUSINESS YOU WILL AGREE TO MY OWN TERMS WITH NO QUESTION OR ANY CHOICE OF PAYING HALF OF THE MONEY WHICH IS (1.2 MILLION USD DOLLARS) TO ME AS AN ADVANCE INTO THE ACCOUNT INFORMATION THAT I WILL PROVIDE FOR YOU TO BE USING IN SENDING THE HALF OF THE MONEY TILL YOU ARE DONE SENDING IT, AGAIN REMEMBER TO KEEP MY REMAINING BALANCE OF MY MONEY ONCE YOU RECEIVE YOUR PACKAGE YOU WILL GIVE THE BALANCE TO MY DELIVERY PARTNER THAT WILL GET YOU THE PACKAGE TO YOU.

IF YOU AGREE TO MY TERMS EMAIL ME BACK IF YOU ARE OKAY WITH MY TERMS. I WILL BE WAITING TO RECEIVE YOUR DETAILS AS SOON AS POSSIBLE AND LETS GET DOWN TO REAL BUSINESS.

IF YOU ARE SURE THAT YOU WANNA DO BUSINESS WITH ME THAT YOU HAVE THE MONEY I PLACE FOR THE COCAINE EMAIL ME BACK, AM NOT HERE FOR SHIT, IF YOU WANNA MAKE REAL CASH EMAIL ME BACK, IF YOU DON'T HAVE THAT KIND OF MONEY DON'T EMAIL ME. 

AM NOT BEGGING ANYONE THAT KNOW THAT HE/SHE CAN NOT AFFORD MY BILL TO EMAIL ME BACK,IF YOU HAVE THE MONEY WHICH IS (2.4 MILLION USD DOLLARS)AND AGREE WITH MY TERMS WITH NO QUESTION OR ANY CHOICE TO PAY ME THE HALF OF THE MONEY WHICH IS (1.2 MILLION USD DOLLARS) BEFORE YOU WILL RECEIVE THE PACKAGE, AND ONCE YOU ARE DONE PAYING THE HALF OF THE MONEY (1.2 MILLION USD DOLLARS) I WILL INSTRUCT MY SALES PARTNERS HIGH SUPER STARTS CLASSIC CELEBRITIES TO CARRY ON WITH YOUR DELIVERY WITH YOUR HELP OF YOUR ADDRESS OR ANY HERE YOU WANT THEM TO BRING IT TO YOU. 

I ALSO WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT THERE IS SO MUCH CASH IN THIS DRUG BUSINESS AND IT IS ONE BUSINESS THAT I REALLY KNOW THAT YIELDS BULK MONEY IN RETURN, BUT IF YOU DO NOT HAVE THAT KIND OF MONEY YOU CAN ALSO GO AND GET A LOAN FROM YOUR OWN BANK AS WELL AS FAST AS YOU CAN TO GET IT WITH NO DELAY. I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I HAVE SO MANY HECTARE'S OF LAND WHERE MY WORKER'S WORK FOR ME AND PRODUCE COCAINE FOR ME ALL THE COCAINE I SALE WE PRODUCE IT IN MY BIG WAREHOUSE.

YOU CAN EMAIL ME BACK VIA MY EMAIL (mohammedbill234@citromail.hu) ALL WILL TALK ABOUT IS BULK MONEY, AM SELF MADE MONEY BOSS, I ASSURE YOU THIS TODAY FOR YOU TO BE A BOSS YOU GOT TO PAY THE COST FOR YOU TO BE A BOSS IN LIFE.

FROM YOURS.
Mohammed Bill.

I suspect you cannot bring the mountain to Mohammed.
-bill kenny


Thursday, October 18, 2018

Look Out, Kid

PLAYBOY: Mistake or not, what made you decide to go the rock-n'-roll route? 

BOB DYLAN: Carelessness. I lost my one true love. I started drinking. The next thing I know, I'm in a card game. Then I'm in a crap game. I wake up in a pool hall. Then this big Mexican lady drags me off the table, takes me to Philadelphia. She leaves me alone in her house, and it burns down. 


I wind up in Phoenix. I get a job as a Chinaman. I start working in a dime store and move in with a 13-year-old girl. Then this big Mexican lady from Philadelphia comes in and burns the house down. 


I go down to Dallas. I get a job as a "before" in a Charles Atlas "before and after" ad. I move in with a delivery boy who can cook fantastic chili and hot dogs. Then this 13-year-old girl from Phoenix comes and burns the house down. The delivery boy - he ain't so mild: He gives her the knife, and the next thing I know I'm in Omaha. It's so cold there, by this time I'm robbing my own bicycles and frying my own fish. 


I stumble onto some luck and get a job as a carburetor out at the hot-rod races every Thursday night. I move in with a high school teacher who also does a little plumbing on the side, who ain't much to look at, but who's built a special kind of refrigerator that can turn newspaper into lettuce. 


Everything's going good until that delivery boy shows up and tries to knife me. Needless to say, he burned the house down, and I hit the road. The first guy that picked me up asked me if I wanted to be a star. What could I say?


PLAYBOY: And that's how you became a rock-'n'-roll singer?


BOB DYLAN: No, that's how I got tuberculosis.
-bill kenny

Wednesday, October 17, 2018

41.5243° North, 72.0736° West

The Friends of Otis Library hold their Fall Book Sale this weekend to kick-start National Friends of Library Week. Despite my basement now having almost as many books as the Otis Library has in theirs (as my loving and lovely spouse has repeatedly pointed out), I’ll be on the hunt for (even) more books because we help the library when we support the book sale. 

Since my last original thought died of loneliness, here’s a blast from my past on the Friends' autumn book sale.

As a kid, I grew up reading Tom Swift. His adventures were my dessert, so to speak as a reward for 'real reading' that we did in my parents' house after we came home from school and had finished our homework.

Our father was a teacher and our house was filled with newspapers, magazines but most especially books. I got my own library card for my seventh birthday. The sense of power it gave me was remarkable and something I can still very vividly recall. That first library card was my passport to anywhere and everywhere in the world anytime I wanted to go. My parents even got me a wallet to put it in even though I was a decade away from having anything else to keep it company.

No longer did I have to plead with my Mom when she was checking out books from the library or try (and usually fail) to negotiate with my dad along the lines of 'for every Sir Walter Scoot and Ivanhoe and Mark Twain and "Connecticut Yankee," I can also have a Chip Hilton or a Hardy Boys book.'

I know, it sounds like "back in the days when dinosaurs roamed the earth" to anyone who's come of age in our current Converged and Connected World of non-stop noise and news but there really was a time when downloading a book to read meant using a step stool in the library to reach a book on a high shelf.

If you have a library card from the Otis Library, you don't need me to tell you about all the places you can go in terms of materials to check out and enjoy, be it music on compact disc or feature-length movies, and of course every manner of book imaginable.

Rows of treasure stacked (nearly) to the ceiling
But this weekend, actually, starting Friday, you don't even have to have a library card because it's the Friends of Otis Library Semi-Annual Book Sale, held in the basement of the library, open to everyone.

It's a great fundraiser for the library and it gets bigger and better every time it's held.  As I said, it starts on Friday morning with an early bird from 9 until 10, that will cost $10 to get a first look at all the treasures.

Officially the sale runs from 10 until 3 on Friday with the same hours on Saturday and on Sunday from noon until three as your last chance to get huge bargains, and, I'd hope, enough reading material to get you to the spring sale. See you there?
-bill kenny

Tuesday, October 16, 2018

Just Because We're Hypnotized

Sometimes I'm less than successful at managing events and they always end up managing me. I fell across a headline of an event that actually happened near the end of June but wasn't reported until this past Friday.

Man run over by lawn mower while trying to kill son with a chainsaw. 

I'm thinking, much like world-class wine, this is a story that has just gotten better and better with age (unlike me). Was I hoping somewhere for a photo of one or the other wearing a Red MAGA ballcap? Yep, guilty as charged
-bill kenny

Monday, October 15, 2018

Well, It Could Have Been a Classic

Lots of dust on this one, seriously. I'm sneezing even now. At the time I called it:

Paddle Faster. I Hear Banjo Music.

I saw that on the bumper of a Jeep in front of me at a stop signal while I was out on some errands. I'm not sure what it meant, but can probably guess and if I were Ned Beatty I'd keep the windows rolled up and the doors locked at the traffic lights. 

The car next to the Jeep was the puzzler. It was a red Hyundai of some kind which had a bumper sticker that read 'Buy American.' I looked to my left to see if the driver of that car got the joke, too, but he was alone with his thoughts in his prison on the road and then it occurred to me it might not be a joke. 

I drive a vehicle usually thought of as Japanese but it was made, I believe, in an assembly plant in Indiana. I spent the Summer of '75 in Indianapolis and the people there seemed to be as American as, well, as American as you and me or the driver of the Hyundai (for all I know). 

When you're approaching Indianapolis via the interstate the trick is to remember (I think; insert obligatory bad memory joke here) that it encircles the entire city so, depending on where you got on it, you can be traveling east in order to go west and vice versa. 

Don't pay that any mind, that's a mistake I made for a couple of months which got me very lost very quickly and I'd wind up in the corner of the state that periodically switched from Eastern to Central time for reasons I never grasped and without warning ever given. 

You do not have to show your passport however which is one of the ways I figure out where I'm not and when I'm not there. I did have to show my license proving I was over twenty-one to get served a beer in a cocktail lounge at Weir-Cook Airport (no, they didn't name it after Bob, I asked), which Pete F, from New Hampshire (all eighteen years and three months of him at the time) thought was hysterically funny as the waitress had already brought him his beer. 

He wasn't laughing quite so hard when I ordered a glass of milk after I put my license back in my wallet and had the waitress give Pete the glass of milk while I drank his beer, a Stroh's fire brewed draft if I remember correctly (and I do). That was the summer I also learned to drink beer fifty/fifty with tomato juice. I was young and the summer was very warm. I was crazy in the heat--that's as close to an explanation as I can offer. 

Anyway, I'm not sure if the Hyundai is made on this side of the Pond or not and if it takes you where you need to go I'm not sure we're not talking difference without distinction. I never got the chance to ask the driver what the point of the bumper sticker was supposed to be or even where the bumper sticker was made. 

Remember that from a couple of years ago, one of those organizations handing out little American flags to 'encourage' patriotism (and discourage what they regarded as dissent) learning their flags were all from some off-shore sweatshop? Talk about a quiet night in the old sleeping bag... 
-bill kenny

Sunday, October 14, 2018

When Something (More) Wicked This Way Comes

I'm never sure which came first, Halloween or New England. Living in Southeastern Connecticut we are transitioning, too rapidly for my taste, from one season to the next and as is too often the case Autumn tends to have enough rain and wind to reduce the leaf-peeping opportunities to mostly "you should've been here two days ago."



This weekend's weather has had a lot of bluster and moisture so that out on a walk yesterday I spent most of my time admiring the leaves on the walkways as opposed to on the trees because they had been blown down and around and were now turning the footing treacherous. Not a fan.


And Autumn also comes with setting back the clocks so that at least to me the daylight feels shorter. For the life of me, after six and a half plus decades around here, I cannot grasp the whole forward and backwards thing we do with clocks. Perhaps we're channeling The Chambers Brothers. Perhaps Not. 


People are decorating for Halloween, not that I indulge. Our kids outgrew the holiday long ago but yeah, I still buy all the Halloween candy (why are "fun-size" bars and bags smaller than regular size? What's the fun of that?) and then on Halloween evening, I turn off all the outside lights and it myself. If Tim Burton could see me now, he wouldn't.   
-bill kenny  

Friday, October 12, 2018

Sweeney Todd Meets Pumpkin Spice

"And I guarantee to you that without a penny's charge I will give you the closest shave you'll ever get."


"I'll come again when you have judges on the menu."
-bill kenny











A Loop, a Whirl, and a Vertical Climb

Thank you, universe! 

Somedays  I have no idea what to write/rant about and other days, this stuff just writes itself. Today is one of those latter days (and not the Saints, sorry. Drew Brees). Read for yourself.

Boris and Natasha say "Fly, You Friendly Spies!"
Bullwinkle, I am told, is shopping for a new agent. Who can blame him?
-bill kenny 

Thursday, October 11, 2018

A Memory that Rings a Bell

I'm currently on my sixth smartphone, some kind of a Samsung that doesn't have a battery that is trying to explode. But when I was a wee slip of a lad there were only cellphones and smartphones and when you said the latter you meant Blackberry with a nod to the new upstart at the time, Apple and the iPhone. 

Turn the page and see where we are now, right? But back in the day I was excited about my Blackberry and called this: 

Paging Mr. Wizard to the White Courtesy Phone
I no longer ever go anywhere without my smartphone, as promised by my son when I got it. I, who went for weeks without even knowing where my cellphone ever was (hint: in the cubbie where we put the opened mail in our kitchen to the left of the back door), now is more likely to nearly forget my wallet than my newest accessory.

And with good reason! My smartphone, probably like yours, has superpowers, if you watch enough of the TV commercials and take three-credit evening course two nights for the rest of your life, "Zen and your Blackberry Tour" or some other such folderol, if only you knew how to harness them. 

That it still takes me forever to figure out how to answer the phone when someone calls me (originally, of course, the whole point behind having a cell phone), is ignored as I struggle to download some Mad Ap that will make me four inches taller, tell me the weather in Dubrovnik or where I can find the nearest gasoline station (that giant Exxon sign that brings this fair city light just isn't enough of a dead giveaway). 

My smartphone can make movies, take pictures (of course!) record conversations if anyone ever talks to me (an untested capability) and allows me to listen to music and surf the web-among other things (the rest I don't think I understand). 

I even have an application that enables me to follow Bundesliga weekend soccer games and checks all of my personal e-mail accounts at the touch of a button or two and usually more (to be honest). 

I've even learned how to 'text', not like the kids can, of course. I'm too old for that and you have to take Pilates for Thumbs to get the full effect. And tell me there's nothing better than watching full episodes of a show I missed on the TV in my living room by watching it on the one-and-a-half-inch diagonal display on my phone. The Marconi Mafia should have lived long enough to see their handiwork. Yes indeed, to a man with a hammer the whole world is a nail

I don't really understand how I can 'miss' a phone call because I wasn't ideally located in the coverage area or was in a 'dead zone' (who came up with that turn of phrase?) but I can still get text messages. My son, who has his patience, I assume, from his foster father as I had none to give him, has explained the concept to me at least a dozen times. And except that I never understand it, he does a good job of it. 

To me, it ranks up there with the mystery of the Thermos bottle. It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold; but how does it know the difference? 
-bill kenny

Wednesday, October 10, 2018

Pasta with Purpose

There used to be a Prince Spaghetti television commercial with a young man racing home through the crowded streets of Boston’s North End on a Wednesday evening in answer to his mom’s dinner call. Do you remember it? How about the little guy’s name? Anthony. Good. Hold that thought. I’ll come back to it in a moment.
   
In an age of nearly instant world-wide connectivity, defining the word community becomes a little more nuanced than it may have been ‘back in the day.’ Not that long ago we had, or were ourselves, neighbors who had lawn signs supporting all manner of causes and programs but now, as times and technologies have changed we “like” posts on social media in support of/or in opposition to our positions or join online groups who feel the same way as we do.

These days, it happens with the click of a mouse sometimes faster than the speed of thought. I often struggle to strike a balance between FBF, Facebook Friends, and F&BF, Flesh and Blood Friends because many of us spend so much time alone together in an environment we’ve created having ALL CAPS arguments with online strangers that we lose sight of important moments happening here and now right in our own neighborhoods. Sort of like looking out a window on Prince Street and not seeing Anthony.   

I mention all of this because of an opportunity I came across, where else, online that we could use to support our Norwich Public Schools, their students, who are our children, and their teachers who are often our neighbors and friends.

I remember when our children were NPS students and there were car washes, basket bashes, and other fund-raising activities we as parents were engaged in to help provide classroom extras. More recently, the Norwich Public Schools (NPS) Education Foundation has contributed more than fifty-five thousand dollars to support classroom activities. 

And not a penny has gone to waste as budgets across all city departments have tightened and our schools have struggled NOT to do more with less but to just continue to offer what they have. We all say education is important and our children are the future of our city but when it comes to putting our money where our mouth is, well, a lot of us are silent.

How about this coming Monday, from 4-6 PM, we put our money where our dinner plates are, and help our schools and our kids, even the ones not named Anthony?

The Norwich Public Schools (NPS) Education Foundation is partnering with Billy Wilson's, at 57 Broadway, for Spaghetti and Meatball Dinners at $10 a person, eat in or take out (or both I suppose if you’ve skipped lunch and breakfast) with all proceeds going to the NPS Education Foundation.

Get your tickets by calling 860-367-1812, visiting the Norwich Public Schools Central Office at 90 Town Street, or emailing npseducationfoundation@gmail.com.

Think of it as pasta with a purposeA great meal for a good cause  
-bill kenny

Monday, October 8, 2018

Dog Day Afternoon

Driving home the other day on Washington Street I saw a lady walking with two dogs-one barely a dog at all, in terms of carbon footprint while the other looked like a Great Dane crossed with a Brick House. I flashed on that expression about 'it's not the size of the dog in a fight but the size of the fight in the dog.' while looking at the pair take their mistress for a pull. 

She had her hands full. The big one, whom I named Lenny, was slow and plodding just taking it all in. The tiny one, George, was pushing to get ahead and move on--possibly not even sure where he was heading, but making great time while doing it. He barked at every falling leaf while Lenny moved as if in slow-motion while we in the booth were reviewing the replay. 

It was entirely possible that one of Lenny's umm, movements would have weighed more than George with his leash and collar on and from the distance that George kept from Lenny it seemed, perhaps, he had come to the same realization. A chopped Honda (beater) with a rear spoiler, because that's what keeps the rear wheels on the ground when the nitro kicks in on the 1.8-liter engine, went humpty-bumpty down Washington, windows wide open, the driver sharing his music with the world. 

The microscopic rep from the Animal Kingdom was the first to voice his displeasure, I am guessing because the bass was so overdriven (cracks appeared in the sidewalk and birds and bugs plummeted stone deaf and dead to earth) so the bass was probably painful for such sensitive ears. George, as befit his size, actually sounded like a squeak toy as he registered his protest. 

Lenny, on the other paw, seemed at first to not notice or mind, as he plodded on oblivious to the SOHC of the Apocalypse heading in his direction, boom chakalaka boom. When the Honda was about from him,  however, Lenny let out a HUGE bellow, the force of which may have actually slowed the Honda down and then stepped into the street, dragging his dog-walking companion with him. 

The Honda hot rodder stood on the brakes, which, thankfully, were at least as good as his sub-woofers, and Lenny stood on his hind legs with his front paws on the car's hood and howled in a piteously pathetic tone that simultaneously told you he was hurting and promised he wouldn't be in pain alone for much longer. Even I, who have difficulty telling which end of the dog to pet and which not to, knew there was no translation needed from the Dog Whisperer. 

The driver fell out, more than exited from the car, frantic that he'd hit the dog. He should have had such luck, instead. he had the animal's fullest attention. The woman was struggling to control George who was doing that small dog classic barking while straining on the leash routine that translates as 'let me at him and I'll murder the bum!' 

Eventually, the driver realized the sound system was the culprit and turned it all a tick to the left of eleven, the dogs quieted down and he got back into his ride. I watched George, always quick to hold a grudge I suspect, christen the guy's front tire. I figured as angry as he'll be about that later, he should be grateful Lenny hadn't followed George's lead.
-bill kenny

A Childhood Memory

As a child at Saint Peter's (sic) School in New Brunswick, New Jersey, it was forcibly impressed upon us by the Sisters of Charity whose...