Thursday, October 7, 2010

Stuck on Stupid

One of the things I hate about American Presidential campaigns is the volume and texture of the excrement office-seekers hurl at each other. You can probably guess the depths of my joy as that same lurid in-my-face and up-my-nose campaign of persuasion has now reached into state offices across the country (thanks youtube for making me feel a bit better that it's NOT just Connecticut politicians who are doing this). That sound you just heard near the end of the clip was your mind boggling that the Father of Our Country was called a 'whoremaster.' My American history book in Mrs. McGarry's fourth grade class at St. Peter's sort of skipped over that.

Not that we Nutmeggers aren't thinking of equally colorful sobriquets for our major party candidates for US Senate and for State Governor. (It's amazing what you learn online. I never knew Howard Stern had endorsed Linda McMahon-things you miss when you give up Sirius; Rob, I. so. envy. you. Not. And who could believe a Rick Astley video would show up in a Tom Foley file-whole new meaning to Never Gonna Give You Up. Just me or is that a video that didn't age well?).

I don't know what the people running for office near your house are spending to get elected in order to represent you (ayup) but I have feelings of inadequacy when I look at the totals here in The Land of Steady Habits that I might not be worth it. I mean who spends millions of dollars running as 'anti-Washington' in order to be elected to go to Washington. Did I miss something? When did 'I know you are, but what am I?' become an approved debate format? Do you think maybe the people in Afghanistan who risked their lives to vote last month are wondering if this is as good as it gets?

Your mail person will be filing for a work-related disability by the time the election season is over, if our mailman's daily load is any indication. And if you're running for office in my area, 'load' is the correct term and I'll leave it at that. Open question: is anyone anywhere engaged in a campaign seeking to identify the root causes of our national economic recession/depression and offering a clearly articulated plan with solutions? If so, is there room in your neighborhood for one more family? We'll use a small moving van at night and pick up after ourselves. We won't want a cable TV hook up (until at least 3 November) and promise to not ask the Post Office to forward our mail.
-bill kenny

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