Sometimes Ruth is stranger than Bridget and at other times, Truth is Stranger than Fiction:
"GAUHATI, INDIA (AP)- In a November 13 story, the Associated Press incorrectly reported that Paris Hilton was praised by conservationists for highlighting the problem of binge-drinking elephants in northeastern India. Lori Berk, a publicist for Hilton, said she never made any comments about helping drunken elephants in India." (Thanks, Bob; like you didn't know this would go in like an icepick, right?)
How many more times can the Paris Hiltons of the world look away? Today, it's binge-drinking elephants and by Friday (Saturday at the latest), we're allowing harmonica-playing porpoises to terrorize schools of tuna as they blow "Room To Move". John Mayall died for some one's sins, Lord, but not mine. We should have spayed the Harmonicats when we had the chance-it was a snip! But no...
Can we go back, maybe one step, in this process? How or why would/could anyone think Paris Hilton, the Dali Lama or the President of the United States (for that matter) would offer an observation on (hard to believe it's a real item) binge-drinking elephants? Inherent in the idea of 'news' is the notion that information is being created, or shared. I don't really think so, this time-and for the AP to correct their report leads me to wonder exactly who in their office was binge-drinking, Pinky the Pachyderm or Eddie the Editor.
And don't even get me started on if binge-drinking elephants get the DT's, what pink animal do they see? (Is Paris Burning or just embarrassed?)
Barkeep, set 'em up again, and get my friend, Horton, a double.
Poor guy has been hearing things again.
-bill kenny
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