Friday, December 30, 2011

Sarah Saturday is Getting Nervous

It may have something to do with math, but not much I suspect. It does make for a strange headline and an even stranger read. Today is tomorrow in Samoa. Why should this surprise you? We put men on the moon-you thought we couldn't disappear a whole day on a small island? There's an app for that, trust me (and we are so getting a different non-Muppet guy to dance in the background next time).

I would imagine children on the island might be wondering why this skipping of a day business couldn't have been arranged for when school is in session. If you were born on this date, you are going to be hard pressed to get a free burger at Red Robin, since it will still be your birthday but the day itself is gone. Sort of a Catch-22 on the next to last day of the year. Who'd have thunk it?

I suspect once the Bombastic Gas Bags seeking new digs in Dodge City get wind of this skulduggery they'll take to the airwaves and the Sunday talk shows blaming all manner of beast and winged thing. I don't expect Governor Perry will have an opinion as he probably doesn't know where Samoa is. Congresswoman Bachman is familiar with Samoa from her days as a Girl Scout  leader, running cookie sales. (You thought I was kidding about that app stuff, eh? And now?)

Professor Gingrich will have an amazingly erudite explanation, as soon as you hire him and Governor Romney will simultaneously endorse and denounce the elimination of today in Samoa while also claiming and denying he attempted it while Governor of Massachusetts. Congressman Paul will see it as another evil of Big Government and the other 47,853 people running (that seems about right) will make as much sense as the Lollipop Guild made a difference where Dorothy's house ended up in Munchkin Land.

Leaves us all with just Fred, his sweater, sneakers and the King. I'll bet one of them wishes Samoa had chosen to eliminate Bastille Day.
-bill kenny

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