Thursday, December 6, 2018

Just Reverse the Bib

My Thelma and Louise were doing a run to the Ikea in New Haven yesterday leaving yours truly to pad about the house by himself. I like to compare a description of my wanderings to a wonderful turn of phrase John Lennon offered about thoughts, 'meander like a restless wind inside a letter box,' but the truth is I'm more like a bee-bee rolling around in a boxcar. 

I was left to my own devices for lunch (Sigrid had made an extra portion of dinner Tuesday evening for me to have last night under the motto 'Poofter's Froth Wyoming Plans Ahead') and I had a multigrain roll with swiss cheese for lunch and since I am the dishwasher in my house, to cut myself some slack, I opted to place my roll on a paper plate.

We get those tall stacks of paper plates that seem to be sort of welded together and that you struggle to separate so as to only have one and I discovered in the course of that wrestling match yesterday that being able to determine when I have more than one paper plate is apparently my super-power. 

I surprised (and for a moment, disappointed) myself with that discovery since and let's face it, I'm not ever gonna get all of that 'I Can Tell When I Only Have One Paper Plate' scrawled across the front of a skin-tight shirt tucked into a pair of tights with a cape. Much less wear that outfit in public. As superpowers go, it's kinda meh I admit. But.

On the other hand, until I made my discovery, I'd gone sixty-six and a half years without having any superpowers at all so I guess there's that. Turns out, in the interest of full disclosure, I  don't have that same ability with red Solo cups. In case you were about to ask.
-bill kenny     

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