Mrs Paul's alibi had better be good

It matters not if it were Al or Tipper Gore who invented The Internet. I say 'God bless'em' even if they didn't sneeze. How else could I have found a story from an Australian newspaper, The Daily Telegraph, with a 'Drop Whatever You're Doing and Read This All the Way to the End Right Now!' headline, Fish Found in Boy's Penis. See? You almost forgot to hit the 'back' button and return here. So much for gratitude, eh?

Between you and me, I will not be surprised if this story proves to be bogus-nor will I be amazed if it turns out to be legit. I am enthralled and excited that our world can hold such truly amazing incidents and accidents, though I suspect in this case more of the former and not so much of the latter. Talk about wincing while reading; I closed my legs and fell down (I was walking at the time).

And, in yet another example of why online is so much niftier than plain pulp paper product newspapers, I offer you the on-line comments for a story like this, all of them. I like to believe that, together, we are always smarter than each of us separately, and then along comes a reportorial Rubicon and once across, I have difficulty going back to my positive belief.

I appreciated "Hector Bismarck of Brisbane" and his suggestion about lobster tanks, and the observation by "Farmer Ted of New Zealand" that may be closer to the truth than the consequences. In the 'old days' of a just printed newspaper, each of us was alone with her/his thoughts, but now the global community can offer insight. I sense a kindred spirit in "LT of cleveland america" who wanted to know if the fish lived. That's how we are, mates. Cut to the chase-full speed ahead and damn the tartar sauce.

I love the euphemism of 'cleaning his aquarium'-so that's what the kids call it these days! Stop hanging with the home fries at the mall, and risk missing the whole drama. It's so Seinfeldesque, really, I can almost hear Jason Alexander sitting across from Kramer in the coffee shop explaining it. What's that proverb 'Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and feed him for a lifetime." What's in it for the fish? It makes me Wanda what John Prine might think of all of this.
"Father forgive us for what we must do/You forgive us and we'll forgive You.
"We'll forgive each other 'til we both turn blue/And we'll whistle and go fishing in the heavens."
-bill kenny