Tuesday, November 26, 2013

The Other Brian's Other Song

Almost 150,000 people die everyday worldwide. That has to be true since it's in bold, right? Obviously, that's an average and, truth to tell, I'm not sure how exact a number that purports to be since I'm less than clear about the methodology used to arrive it, but if you can't trust the CIA, who came up with it, then who can you trust? The NSA? Maybe the PTA?

And the CIA website has a Kid Zone. Who'd have thunk it? Actually that works out almost perfectly as what do kids love more than cartoons? More cartoons (if you'd make the rehearsals, the audience participation segments of this blog might not be such a surprise all the time; just sayin'.)

And the only ones who like more cartoons more than kids are adults who watch Fox on Sunday nights where it's nothing but cartoons, excuse me, animation. I love that kind of rooty-tooty-snootiness. Animation rather than cartoons.

It's like at some point a generation of grocery stores ago we stopped saying noodles and started saying pasta. And upping the price, of course because you can always charge more for pasta than you'll get for noodles. Not that long ago as I remember it, the Fox guys tried to stick a show with actual people on it in the middle of their cartoon stuff and the show bombed.

Yeah, the same folks who brought me a highlighted puck when they televised hockey games, every Sunday all fall and into the winter goes from larger than life 'gridiron warriors' to cartoons and their audience never misses a beat.

Except maybe this past Sunday when one of the cartoon shows killed off one of the lead characters by having him get hit by a car he was chasing. Poor Bill O'Reilly, he deserved better. Not much, we are talking about O'Reilly after all but still. And besides he's not the one who died.

The character who got whacked was a dog named Brian voiced by the series creator, Seth McFarland, on Family Guy. I suspect many of those who suffered stoically, and not so, while McFarland annihilated the Oscars' presentation not that long ago are now wondering what took God so long to answer their prayers.

Besides, it's only a cartoon-an animated figure if you will. It could have only been more dramatic had he been eating a bowl of pasta when a case of bottled water fell on him. Preferably imported water, of course, Fiji or if the budget can't be stretched, Perrier. This is prime-time television so none of the that low power VHF stuff around here.
-bill kenny

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