Sunday, September 21, 2014

Horse Poop, Hospitals and Health Insurance

We’re a long way from Hippocrates, who by the way is NOT accepting new patients. Speaking of which I’m just about out of patience with the business practices of Healthcare Inc., or as it’s usually known, life in these United States.

Unlike about 42 million fellow-citizens, I have health insurance with a not inconsequential portion of the premiums paid for by my employer, as part of what I will always insist is a Social Contract, one of the many each of us has in our lives with our family members, places of residence, businesses and our neighbors. That, too is part of life in these parts.

I don’t pretend to know if “Healthcare” (capitalized to denote Serious Intent, which is actually access to affordable care, is a ‘right’ or an ‘expense driving business to relocate elsewhere’ as is becoming a recurring theme of one of the knuckleheads running for Governor of the state in which I live) but I’m reasonably sure it is a necessity. 

Right now, the multi-billion dollar conglomerate that is my healthcare insurer, is arguing ferociously with the multi-million dollar corporation that operates my neighborhood hospital over how much is enough money for my care and healing (though in truth neither of those enters into the bottom line of either of them). 

Every single one of my doctors, and I have what looks like cast of Entourage in white lab coats, have privileges in my hospital. I am not alone, probably times eight to thousand households across the region; that, too, is of no interest to the suits on either side in the boardroom on the 83rd floor that are negotiating fees and rates one will pay the other for the next defined period of time and benefits.

As it is, if both sides don’t come to an agreement by the end of this month, by the end of NEXT month, I and my family and many, many others will face choices like do I wish to pay more for what is now an ‘out of network’ provider or do I seek new health care offerings, or entertain changing my insurance.

None of this has anything to do with health care in a way that any sentient human being would ever understand. It has to do with return on investment for those who buy health insurance company stock as well as those who park dollars in the corporations who operate medical facilities and whose money is what makes money for them (no sweat of their brow is ever expended; no good or service is produced this is all the triumph of Green Mail and Mammon).

When I was a wee slip of a lad, when I’d get sick or hurt my parents would call Dr. Alice D. Tyndall, whose passing I did not know of until hitting ‘search’ five seconds ago and which pains me immensely because she was a remarkable human being. Read about her here.

Here’s what the obit doesn’t tell you: she made house calls with a beaten-up bag of magic and miracles that not only always made me and at the time, my younger sister, Evan, feel better but our Mom, too.  House calls went the way of high-button shoes, but I’d bet Dr. Tyndall and her cohorts still made them despite the patients per hour mantra of all the slicksters, tricksters and bean-counters in three-piece suits who argued with her over every nickel.
         
All that happens in today's 'health care market,' and I‘m telling you something you already know, is deductibles escalate, exclusions proliferate and co-pays continue to increase. And that is what’s going to happen in this case. Any form of  improvement in actual care will be coincidental at best.

The health insurance company knows it, the hospital knows it and here’s the secret, guys, so do I. So spare me and mine the trauma and the drama, cut your deal and send me the updated benefits brochure extolling intangibles such as added value for shareholders, none of which has anything to do with me but all of which I will pay for now and later if not forever until my own forever runs out.  

-bill kenny

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