Thursday, November 19, 2015

When the World Was Round

I do a superlative impersonation of Sean Connery as James Bond, especially if you’ve never heard him speak. Even more so if you’ve never heard me speak. My point: sweeping generalizations make for great voice bytes and headlines, but are a pretty crappy way to lead your life, or a nation when responding to a crisis. 

Making it more difficult is when generalizations flatten context and lose perspective so that you end with “since all ducks are birds, all birds must be ducks.” The Only-Kinda-Sorta light is burning brightly on that one, but feel free to follow the yellow brick road if you are so inclined, and let me know how pigeon tastes with orange sauce (your equation, your lunch entrée; fair is fair).

I stole this from a FB friend, Sally, who found it I have no idea where.

In the interests of equal time I would point out in my version, I would add Kanye West, probably right alongside The Nuge (put ‘em in a sack and hit it with a bat and you’d get the right one), which helps me prove my point about generalizing about generalizations.

To some extent, Pope Francis and I are identical (when viewed from space admittedly) because we’re both Catholics (stay with me on this one, okay), but we are definitely two very different human beings and any conclusions you reach about “Catholics” based on me would be 180 degrees out after knowing His Holiness. Your mileage (and chances for beatification) would definitely vary. 

I don’t take it personally (not sure how the Pope would feel about it, but he seems like a good sort) but what I do take personally is someone hijacking a moment of silence to offer a loud-mouth drive-by generalization. Here’s something I never thought I’d type: Bravo, Aaron Rodgers. 

Here’s the deal. If this doesn’t bother you, please stop dropping by here because it should.

Here’s my takeaway on days when whackjobs rule the earth, offered by someone with more experience than the rest of us put together on timing your life with the monsters when the monsters won’t go away.

-bill kenny

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