Happy Birthday, Abraham Lincoln. So sad the nation of which
you were President and for which you gave your life has a ‘let’s make this
holiday stuff convenient’ policy that rolls yours and George Washington’s birth
anniversaries onto a day that’s neither of yours to honor all Presidents including
many of whom we do not know. To you of the
2012 Class of William Henry Harrison High School in
Tippecanoe County, West Lafayette, Indiana, Salute! Your home room assembly Friday lasted nearly
as long as Bill’s term of office. Sic transit Gloria.
Elsewhere, on a small planet in a minor galaxy around a
dying star…When I have a fair amount of luck and am heading down a slope with a
tailwind, I can on occasion create a moment of whimsy and/or lightheartedness
that might charitably be regarded as funny. Meanwhile, beyond the confines of
my keyboard, nature and the real world run riot and when they intersect, Andrew Toothman ensues.
I know-this is the kind of story that less than a thousand words
does not do justice. Heck with that! TEN thousand words barely break the
surface. Where to begin: What brand of peanut butter? Smooth or crunchy?
“Completely covered.” Oh, really, do tell! The Hershey’s and Toblerone folks
are racing to make flight connections and assemble endorsement packages.
The Godiva and Lindt combines are circling one another suspiciously, eyes
glazed with mistrust and what seems to be a light frosting.
I’m thinking there’s a shoe sponsorship arrangement in
Andy’s future, perhaps on the Style Channel, but I’m wondering if he’s not
better off sticking to slip-ons, and being shot from the waist up. If it’s of any help, I did find his opening
act if he takes the show on the road. Skippy! You
got some ‘splainin’ to do.
-bill kenny
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