Soup to Nuts Bowl

I’m not a fan of American football.  When I was young enough to be able to play it, I wasn’t very good at it and now I’m old and brittle and don’t see a great deal to relate to in watching it. In theory the Super Bowl is different because, well, because it’s the Super Bowl, dadgumit!

I would have watched this year, what with living in New England and having grown up in the state the Giants should call home, New Jersey. When did East Rutherford become the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim? The Maras and Steve Tisch give us a hard time about changing the name they can load up their Jimmy Hoffa body bags, get on the PATH trains and go back to Journal Square.

Like I said, I was gonna watch except Cloo had a House Marathon and there’s a few episodes I hadn’t yet seen 200 times. I really like House and not just because I remind people of him, as I've been told. But I can see the similarity; I speak English and Hugh Laurie is English. I’m short and squat and he’s tall and lean. We both have bald spots. He always has a three day growth and I have no idea how to do that or I’d have one too. He walks with a cane but uses the wrong hand to hold it. My teeth are better and my own. I win.

Only in the USA, Home of Hyperbole, could you take a sporting event that only one other nation plays seriously, and what Canada has ain’t what we do, and make it into the Greatest Show on Earth and then TOP that with elaborate commercial interruptions that are supposedly the reason for the presentation of the sport in the first place but that have taken a position of prominence Hank Stram and Vince Lombardi could have never imagined.

Speaking of those commercials, I am assuming Elton got to use his own shoes in the Pepsi spot, you too? The Go Daddy spot carried on their tradition of looking like a high school A/V club made it. The Dannon Oikos spot reminded me the Greeks have bigger worries than the Euro crisis and nearly all the car commercials, except for the Camaro, were meh. I just learned that word from Facebook and looked it up here so I hope I used it correctly. 

Actually I enjoyed the Twinkies and the rain of frogs in the Silverado spot, but have problems with the Fiat 500 Abarth spot. And it’s not just explaining to my wife why one of those (the four wheel version) is sitting in the garage so much as rationalizing the invoice for all those Rosetta Stone Italian lessons. Do you think she’ll believe Topo Gigio is making a comeback and needs a roadie? Oh Eddie….

-bill kenny