Roman Numerals and Greek Games

Does reading about the XXIII Winter Olympic Games also count as watching them on television? No?Just as well because I'm not reading about them either in addition to not watching them. It doesn't mean I don't like them; I'm sure they're wonderful but I think the sports offerings need to be a bit broader. 

I know I missed the opening march-in, or it probably has a very fancy title, where all the competitors from all the nations enter the filled-to-overflowing-with-cheering-crowds arena to tumultuous cheers and huzzahs while we at home, warm and safe in our living rooms, tsk-tsk the way everyone is dressed. Opportunity missed I say.

Why not make the 'national garb grand entrance' an event and have (perhaps) Tim Gunn and the Project Runway judges grade everyone. I'm trying to imagine the last member of the Lesotho luge team turning to look back at Heidi Klum as they parade past and she's holding up a placard with either 9.9 or Go Home (not sure which one is more helpful for ratings so I'll check with the suits of NBC).

And since most of the events are still before us, why not combine a few sports? How about Synchronized Downhill Skiing though, I must admit synchronized ski-jumping is not without its appeal, especially if one skier crashes so the other one must unstick the landing to keep the score up.

Combining ice skating with ice hockey has already been done-ask the Nashville Predators-but what about combining the bobsled and high hurdles? Or, even more interesting (to me), why not just pull random people from the crowds who are there to watch the events, and make them compete in the events?

How much more purely amateur can you get than someone who not only is not being sponsored to take part in the luge but who has no idea how to do it? NBC wants must-see TV-this will help create Oh-God-I-Can't-Watch! moments no matter how much tape delay is involved because of the time difference.

All this time we've been following headlines about the Unified Korean team and how Mike Pence doesn't think sports and politics mix when black athletes kneel at Colts' football games but is okay with it 10,000 miles from home.

I think we may have lost sight of the true spirit of the original Olympics which seems to have something to do with thick yogurt sales or just sitting back marveling at the audacity of the human spirit and our strength of purpose in pursuit of the things that we love.
-bill kenny