Tuesday, July 2, 2019

And We Lived to Tell the Tale

I'm not clear on the difference between gourmet and gourmand, or even if there is one. But for sake of argument. let's say there is. I have spent over six and a half decades above ground eating food. I'm quite good at it in that 'if practice makes perfect then perfect practice makes it more so' kind of way. 

If you were to ask me what I know how to prepare at meal-time, I'd list Lipton Chicken Noodle Soup, canned corned beef hash, hot dogs, chili, most microwave stuff unless it gets complicated and requires me to do any form of math, and no sixth thing that comes to mind immediately. 

Yeah, I'm clueless on how to make food that's not already food or nearly so. That's why I'm not sure when our daughter, who was visiting the other day and leafing through a free food magazine that I picked up at the Stop and Shop started reading aloud some of the salad as meal recipes, my fancy was tickled by something called "BLT Salad." 

She also was kind enough to show me how the oven worked without my having to burn the kitchen down while trying to bake the bacon (and also how to use the timer on the range instead of the smoke alarm to know when the bacon was done in the oven).

Magazine's concept of BLT Salad
I appreciate the 'simple swap to use nonfat plain Greek yogurt in place of mayonnaise for the same tangy taste with less fat,' but since I was tossing some of the ingredients overboard before we got to the water's edge, the simple swap didn't matter to me.

The recipe had me at bacon. I decided to add some pre-cooked chicken pieces, for protein (I have no idea what that means except it sounds cook-like), to two large cut-up hydroponic tomatoes and a spring salad mix (I'm guessing the container didn't know it was July). And I tossed it all in the biggest bowl I could find which was almost not big enough.

I left out: 1/2 cup light mayonnaise, 1 clove garlic, 2 tbsp. wine vinegar, 1 tbsp olive oil, 3 tbsp chopped fresh chives and 2 cups Italian seasoned croutons. If you're keeping a running total, yes, there were more left-outs than put-ins. (and thank goodness for hyphens or instead of Italian dressing I'd have been expected to use Russian).

My version in repose
(scratch and sniff not available)
I quite liked it and my life-long lover seemed to enjoy it as well. Perhaps next time I'll take a stab at English Muffin pizzas. I mean, we have catsup and cheese (and Thomas' English Muffins, the official muffin of the Kenny household). The rest is just the genius of improvisation. I hope.
-bill kenny     

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