Saturday, July 13, 2019

Who Knew These Were the Good Old Days?

There are days in recent weeks where I feel like 'Video Killed the Radio Star' in terms of how my get up and go has gotten up and went. It's not just physical but also mental as it hurts more than usual to even think (which explains why I do so little of it so often). It would seem I've been feeling like this for longer than I thought to judge by this item from a decade ago. I called it then:  
 

Bow-ties and High Noon

More and more we live in a word-less world. By that, I don't mean a silent one but rather, a world in which you can scrape by with pictures and symbols. I love looking at the tags in shirts--it's like a graduation from Semaphore University. There's no bleach, hang-dry only, wash in cold water, dolphin-free, dry-clean, only etcetera. 

I thought it reassuring that no matter where in the world you travel those symbols are the same until I realized it has a lot to do with the manufacturing process and that almost all the clothes we buy, no matter where in the world we live, are made in the same third-world sweatshops. That's more likely the reason why the care symbology at the collar is the same. Oh. 

I'm not going to hold a Geography Bee with Carmen San Diego on where our clothes are made, because I have no trouble finding my way around as nearly everyone tells me where to go. And that's an unfair advantage even for a television star to overcome. 

What I am intrigued by is how our technology, not knowing where in the world we will use it, has created its own language to which we have universally adopted and adapted. Do you remember when you used to yell for 'Help!'. Our machines' clocks do the same thing, sort of, except they flash 12:00--we all know that means there's trouble at the mill and are now conditioned, when we see it, to look around for a cause. 

My smart-phone does this weird little vamp when it's loading an application. Maybe yours does the 'gimme a minute jitterbug', too. It looks like a vertical bow-tie and then it starts to whirl and twirl in a clockwise direction. Someone told me it's NOT a bow-tie at all, it's supposed to be an hourglass. That actually makes more sense to me, since that would have something to do with time, which is what the device is wasting, and not neckwear, of which I have a closetful though I have no idea of its purpose (or didn't) even though I wore one on most workdays for decades. 

Every time I see the posters for the raffles, there's always the disclaimer at the bottom, 'duplicate prizes awarded in the event of ties' and I keep thinking, today's the day. Good fortune, here I am! Luck be a Lady tonight. And yet all I ever win is a dry-clean only dolphin two sizes too small, no bleach only.
-bill kenny

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