Napoleon Had Elba (Briefly)

I think it's fatigue, perhaps from the endless roar of head noise masquerading as our news cycle with one catastrophe after the other chasing across the lower part of the television screen. 

From Russia raping Ukraine, the North Koreans (on the verge of starvation) launching ICBMs into the Sea of Japan probably in violation of a fishing treaty, a school/house of worship/a health care facility being ground zero for the latest exercise of unbridled ammosexuality, or the continuing to escalate cost of living in these United States, my state of mind is such that the last thing I want, need, or desire is the incessant barrage of self-aggrandizing email from The Former Guy, #Pantload 45. 

I get four to seven emails from him and Don Jr every day. Hawking golf balls (so on-brand I wonder where the dead animal shot with a large caliber automatic weapon is), something called Trump Gold Cards, and every form of tchotchke under the sun. Every email is a money hustle. How can I miss him if he never goes away? 

He works harder to raise money for himself now than he did for the four years he supposedly worked for the rest of us in the White House. What does he need it for, lawyers' retainers? Let's ask Rudy Guiliani or Sidney Release the Kraken about billable hours.

I know, grifters gonna grift but who the fuqq responds to his pleas by sending him their money? And don't tell me no one does because if that were the case these emails would cease to be sent. Jetzt hatte ich die Nase voll. At the bottom of the most recent electronic epistle:

I think the Evangelical closing was a nice touch, don't you? What do you wanna bet that I will continue to hear from the Mango Mussolini and his Minions, even after all the tumult of the televised hearings because we are a nation with the attention span of a goldfish that chases the Next Big Story and one will surely come along. 

Soon Faux Gnus will break into their regularly scheduled screeds with an update about Amber Heard leading a caravan of illegal Green New Deal immigrants across the southern border with Bill Gates' fake meat from Peach Tree Dishes that not even Gaspacho Police armed with Jewish Space Lasers can stop. We haven't seen this kind of carnage since the Bowling Green Massacre, or Obama's brown suit. Oh, the humanity!
-bill kenny