My coal-black heart, while not growing two sizes at the good news, did leap (more or less) for something approximating joy when I learned shortly before noon Monday that the heir of the Swanson TV dinners fortune would be dining alone at least for the immediate future.
His own network, Faux, whom he so obediently served for so long buried his conscious uncoupling more than halfway down the front page of their website.
But when they did post it, they captured him with his trademark too-stupid-to-comprehend-what-is-happening-to-him look that he has worn for nearly every minute of every broadcast since he first popped up wearing a bowtie seated across from Paul Begala until that fateful night Jon Stewart handed him his ass and within weeks Crossfire was gone from CNN and Tucker had fled for the politically friendly white supremacist environs of Fox.
And now Tucker has learned...you know, I'm not sure what he's learned. Even less than the slack-jawed monosyllabics who watched him. I suspect. Fox News barely and rarely covered the Dominion lawsuit so it's possible his viewers will assume he was a victim of an act of God. Or Chem Trails (more likely).
It seems Fox will now have rotating hosts though if they could just reanimate Josef Goebbels, and Rupert would spring for the money for a good voice and diction coach to work on the accent, I'm sure most of Tucker's show's scripts are already loaded on the teleprompter and the audience wouldn't miss a beat.
Parting shot? Hey, Fox, do Hannity next.
Game, Set, and Match.
-bill kenny
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