Last Month of the Year

As a retiree, I have trouble keeping track of days of the week, time of day, and the minutaie of everyday life. Over the Thanksgiving holiday weekend, I had a text wishing me a wonderful holiday and had to ask the person sending the well-wishes who it was. It was my oldest younger sister, Ouch.

Anyway. New month, new me, well, not really, but you know what I mean. 

I sprang out of bed this morning at not nearly the crack of dawn (I spent decades getting up in the wee small hours convinced that whoever it was I was working for at the time would collapse if mine wasn't the first car in the lot in the morning and the last one at night. Such a dope.), checked my blood sugar and my blood pressure, then took all my morning meds (it's a full handful in case you were curious). 

I then got ready to do nothing. Not close to nothing, Not nearly nothing, but absolutely nothing while waiting for lunch. Well, except for reading this. 

Don't know about you, but I never realized how arduous time wasting could be unless you practice. The trouble with doing nothing or close to nothing is figuring out when you're finished. 
-bill kenny

The First Sunday after Black Friday

Somewhere on the way to here, I lost my way. Not as in shuffled off the beaten path and got lost, but defiantly chose to not do as those who came before me had chosen for generations. Too stiff-necked to this day to acknowledge my failings and weaknesses, I'm often in doubt but never in error. At least in my own mind.

Today marks the beginning of a season of preparation; for the devout, it is for the coming of the Saviour. I've never been quite sure what it is people like me are doing or supposed to do. I miss the comfort of the ritual and the sense of shared belonging. I fill up my hollow days with noise to distract me from hearing the approaching roar. 

I've never been clear if I am to look to the future with anticipation or fear. 

I do understand I'll find out soon enough and sooner than planned.

-bill kenny