Slowly Circling the Drain

Prepping for a bigly Monday in Manhattan.

And someday, like a miracle, he'll just disappear.
-bill kenny

Greetings from the Vegetable Kingdom

Hope you survived the wind and rain. 

Where we are, it was nearly biblical in scale and scope. 

Anyway. Apropos of nothing. My wife showed me a Facebook online ad and I confess to NOT remembering what it was about but I do recall the name of the spokesperson, 'Celerie.' 

I'm sorry but what the f(iretr)uck is the matter with this woman's parents that they sort of named her after a vegetable some nutritionists see as structured water locked into a vegetable matrix (to my mind, this easily explains Keanu Reeves) that many of us will only eat when covered with ranch dressing or peanut butter. 

I was so inspired, that I suggested we consider having another child and, were he a male, calling him Russell Sprouts. Her counterproposal involved my being hoisted by something other than my petard, rendering further discussion about procreation moot.
-bill kenny

A Long Way from Sunny Goodge Street

The caterpillar sheds his skin to find the butterfly within.

First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.
-bill kenny

Thank You, Holly

What follows was shared by someone I'll never meet on a social network. It stung and still does.

"I asked a friend who has crossed 70 & is heading towards 80 what sort of changes he is feeling in himself? He sent me the following:

1 After loving my parents, my siblings, my spouse, my children, and my friends, I have now started loving myself.

2 I have realized that I am not “Atlas”. The world does not rest on my shoulders.

3 I have stopped bargaining with vegetable & fruit vendors. A few pennies more is not going to break me, but it might help the poor fellow save for his daughter’s school fees.

4 I leave my waitress a big tip. The extra money might bring a smile to her face. She is toiling much harder for a living than I am.

5 I stopped telling the elderly that they've already narrated that story many times. The story makes them walk down memory lane & relive their past.

6 I have learned not to correct people even when I know they are wrong. The onus of making everyone perfect is not on me. Peace is more precious than perfection.

7 I give compliments freely & generously. Compliments are a mood enhancer not only for the recipient but also for me. And a small tip for the recipient of a compliment, never, NEVER turn it down, just say "Thank You.”

8 I have learned not to bother about a crease or a spot on my shirt. Personality speaks louder than appearances.

9 I walk away from people who don't value me. They might not know my worth, but I do.

10 I remain cool when someone plays dirty to outrun me in the rat race. I am not a rat & neither am I in any race.

11 I am learning not to be embarrassed by my emotions. It’s my emotions that make me human.

12 I have learned that it's better to drop the ego than to break a relationship. My ego will keep me aloof, whereas, with relationships, I will never be alone.

13 I have learned to live each day as if it's the last. After all, it might be the last.

14 I am doing what makes me happy. I am responsible for my happiness, and I owe it to myself. Happiness is a choice. You can be happy at any time, just choose to be!" Hello in there.

-bill kenny

Unringing the Division Bell

With apologies to whoever’s online post I stole this from, there are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who understand the binary system and those who don't. And people wonder why Math Stand-up Comedy has been so slow to catch on (Not that I’m helping).

I referenced that online theft to make a terrible joke because I spend a lot of time there, online; and by a lot, I mean all capital letters on LOT. I find it’s often easier (and certainly easier on those family and neighbors with whom I do interact) than real life. (I’m also taller online than in real life, mainly because I type while standing on the keyboard).

I’m old enough to remember life before we could Google things (I can remember thinking “‘Google’ is a pretty stupid name for something,” and now it’s a verb I use all the time) and I’m more than willing to listen to you argue that the convergence of interconnective technologies and the pervasiveness of the world wide web are both the greatest and simultaneously most horrible things to have happened in my lifetime, mostly because they are.

Those were exciting early days weren’t they, that whole kabuki theatre thing of signing on with some of those ‘free hours’ that came on a floppy disc (do they still make those things anymore?) and praying that no one tried to call your house while you were going online? I think at one time the modem noise was part of the soundtrack to all our lives and look at us now: we trade grumpy cat pictures and post every imaginable kind of information (mis and/or otherwise) with the click of a mouse and without a second thought. Strange days indeed.

I interact with people online all day long about whom I know nothing (nor do they about me) and can get drawn into conversations and even protracted arguments (typing in ALL CAPs is arguing online-how amazing is that?) and never know if the other person is next door or on another continent (assuming they exist at all. If ‘Google’ was a stupid word, what should we make of ‘bot?’).

There’s so much chaff among the wheat, metaphorically speaking and in terms of abstracts like ‘truth,’ or ‘facts,’ it’s every person for themselves. In the time before the internet, Samuel Clemons, Mark Twain to most of us, is supposed to have offered, “A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.” At least that’s what’s posted online all over the place, so how ironic is it that in all probability someone other than Twain said it? And what does that tell us about research and scholarship here in the Information Age?   

Our new normal started online where everything can be surreal, unreal, and real all at the time (like Schrodinger's Cat but as a meme) but is now also everywhere in real life to be confronted (and often confounded at least I am) by those whose attitude suggests ‘my ignorance is as good as your knowledge. And maybe even better.').  

I was raised to ‘check your sources,’ and I still do and encourage everyone to do the same, but too many live in a world where whoever shouts the loudest is considered right, even if they’re wrong, or worse. 

You’ve been patient but now you’re restive: get to the point! 

In the weeks ahead, locally with our city budget and months ahead as November nears, gather as much information as you can before making decisions. In real life, bells cannot be unrung. 
-bill kenny

I Can See by What You Carry

I try to maintain an open mind, but not so open that my brains fall out, and treat each person I meet with the civility I hope they will extend to me. I do have a couple of pre-screen visual cues that I deploy to save me both time and aggravation. 

Folks with Trump hats, shirts, or (God forbid) Gold Sneakers get a quick walk-by, as does anyone with CCDL apparel of any kind. Don't think of me as just a hypocrite who's a bigot, which is certainly true, but a time-saving hypocrite, for both of us.  

Other red flags (a pun on the color intended), are those who proclaim themselves to be an InfoWarrior; I consider you to be a QAnon Vanilla ISIS Yee Hawdist with your own teeth (for the most part) but my favorite RMNJ are readers of Epoch Times (an intellectual oxymoron, or should be). 

Underscoring the importance, as Bob Barker used to say, of spaying, and the consequences for failing to do so, I came across this news item and can only hope that those most tempted to answer their call are too stupid to read. I've encountered enough of them to know they're too stupid to think.

Small comfort, I fear.
-bill kenny  

Braced and Ready

This is the big day of the eclipse, right? Seems like everyone wants to be involved and engaged and I do mean everyone.

Remember, don't look up or at least don't look up without being prepared.  

Elect an asshole, expect a shit-show

Here are some tips from folks who should know.

Enjoy.
-bill kenny