Friday, April 19, 2024

Let a Smile Be Your Umbrella

At seven-plus decades here on the Big Blue Marble, I am perhaps inordinately proud of having very nearly all my own teeth and hardly any cavities. If you know me even in passing you will realize I have very little else to which I can point with pride, so thank you for letting me have my teeth.  

I have a daily routine to which I adhere, no matter what, no matter where. I floss, then I brush (with my electric toothbrush) my teeth for two minutes with Sensodyne Mint toothpaste (the others taste awful) followed by two minutes with Crest Pro Health Advanced Gum toothpaste (my dentist has advised me I have receding gums that could be in a race with my hairline but I know better than to ask) and then after waiting ten minutes or so, a quick mouthwash dental rinse. 

Actually, I chose the wrong word in the preceding paragraph, I meant ritual rather than routine. Perhaps it's that level of devotion that caused me to recoil when I came across an article reporting on the growing apostasy (at least to me) that toothpaste is unnecessary.

Pshaw! I say and fiddlesticks! Besides, what I'm trying to understand is why it's not called teethpaste.
-bill kenny

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